May 22, 2011

pain

The pain spike again hit without warning but with great persistence and stubbornness.  It's as if we make an agreement with Pain.  Pain decides to honor that agreement but then it just capriciously changes the rules and neglects to tell us.  It's a one sided negotiation and then it's up to us to meet Pain's renegotiated terms.  It took some off-the-reservation methods but we have it back under control.  He is resting as peaceful as possible given the circumstances.  First shift is mine.  The dosing schedule that works, at least right now is every thirty minutes like clockwork.  Hopefully, it's a slow night.  I got some good reading done, Steinbeck's East of Eden, but now my eyes are too tired.  So thirty minutes is just enough time to throw out an update, listen to some jazz, or watch a tv show on netflix.  That netflix is courtesy of my brother.  He and his wife got us a subscription for Christmas.  He knew how much I liked unwinding after studying by watching various irreverant and vulgar tv shows.  It's striking how it's all those little things that spark the memories.  It's a cliche but it's true.  It's those little things that made him who he was that I'll greatly miss.  I already do.  But now it's time to dose again.  Pain's terms will be honored.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Peace will come.